The Spirit of Contention: Understanding Gospel Perspectives on Disagreement

This week, I’m not alone in the Chocolate Cake Bytes studio—Verlin from the Cultural Hall podcast joins me for a conversation that’s more lively (and maybe less wisecracking) than going solo. We take on a topic that gets thrown around a lot in church settings: is there really a difference between conflict and contention? And are we “of the devil” every time we disagree?

Verlin and I go deep into what the scriptures actually say—and what they don’t—about the spirit of contention and how sometimes, avoiding conflict isn’t as virtuous as we might think. Along the way, we laugh about sibling boxing matches, rebellious chili spice levels, and the perils of answering, “Does this make me look fat?” But the heart of the episode is a practical, gospel-centered look at how facing disagreements with honesty and kindness can help us grow—and how curating our lives and even our social media feeds toward goodness can help us avoid contention, not conflict.

If you’ve ever found yourself tiptoeing around hard conversations, or you’re wondering how to handle “porcupines” in your life, this episode is for you. Let’s learn how to resolve differences while keeping the sweet spirit the gospel offers.

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Check out my new podcast: The Unstuck Career podcast at
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